Consultation with Fertility Doc

So we found this great doctor- he had helped a few friends of mine that had other issues and they both have had healthy babies. He said we had a few options, one better than the other. One is Artificial Insemination. This only would up our chances of getting pregnant the natural way by only a few percentage points. We could try it but he seemed pretty doubtful that it would work. It was leaps and bounds cheaper than Invitro, which by the way was our other options. There is NO WAY we could come up with $10,000 to pay for this procedure. And after barely just paying off the $4,000 emergency bill for a miscarriage, thinking about paying that amount of money and possibly NOT getting pregnant didn't sit well with me.

The Doc said that with our situation, our best option is Invitro. Can you say punch in the gut 5 times fast?

So we had some decisions to make.

Wasting time

I suck, let me just get that out right now. I like to stick my head in the sand when problems come my way. I kept thinking that we will just get pregnant when we are "supposed to". At least that is the line you are supposed to say to everyone when they give you that look, you know the one; the "oh poor little dried up uterus that can't have babies" look. So for 2 years we did NOTHING. I mean, we had sex of course- but no doctors, no fertility stuff, nothing. You see what I mean when I say head in the sand now, right?

I keep saying that we just weren't ready. I don't know, maybe we were- if we ended up getting pregnant I am sure we would have gotten our crap together, figured it out- but really I just didn't want to face the truth that our lives were not going to be as easy in this department as everyone else.

So we have just been wasting time. Wasting time thinking the problem would fix itself. Praying that it would just happen without any special or expensive things we had to do.

Man, I was so retarded.

A night at the Olive Garden

I went to my OBGYN and she suggested that my husband go and get his sperm tested. She mentioned that when women have a early miscarriage sometimes it can be tracked back to the male sperm. Ha, another thing I didn't know.

So picture this, my husband goes to the "bow-chicka-bow-wow" room- him mortified, trying to be as quiet as possible and understands that afterwards he has to put his, ah, gift, in this cabinet in the wall that opens on the other side where people take the ...present. So he gets all ready, turns off the light and super quietly puts the cup in the dispenser and hi-tailed it out of there. Men are so funny; women lay on a table, spread eagle- naked, with people poking and sticking things in you...and they are afraid of one little donation. No wonder women are the only ones able to have kids. Men would whine at us until we took it from them to do it.

Ah and then the results....there we sat at the Olive Garden, on our anniversary no doubt and we get the great news; immobility, poor and low count. G-R-E-A-T.

Miscarriage blues

4 years ago my husband and I decided that we wanted to have a baby. Naive 'ol me thought we'd be pregnant in the first month. It was so strange to go month after month with nothing...but seriously I didn't even know about ovulation and all that crap- hey, I told you I was naive. Didn't you just have sex and get pregnant? For heaven's sake- I know girls who NEVER had sex, they just sat next to a boy and got pregnant....maybe that was what they told their parents. ANYWAY about a year later we found out that we were pregnant. Ahhh...finally! I was okay, I was REALLY starting to think there was something wrong.

Then one day I started cramping and bleeding. Bottom line I miscarried at 11 weeks. It was totally devestating and sad- not that I was sad for the baby, more that I was sad for the hope. Does that make sense? Okay, so now what the heck is wrong?